0
0
Dress or Cape? Which is it? When I first spotted the “It was never a dress” campaign, I loved the witty, creative shift in an extremely identifiable image assigned to gender.
When I was pregnant with my daughter eight years ago, it’s not that I banned pink from her nursery, but I was beyond exhausted of the pink vs. blue. You are knocked over with pastel pinks and blues from the moment you become pregnant. (Fortunately, it isn’t quite as overwhelming as it used to be.) I filled her room with pink, blue and every other color under the sun. I wanted to give her the whole darn rainbow. So that’s what I did.
Maybe it stemmed from my earliest memories of being the only girl playing with Star Wars toys, or maybe it has to do with my indifference to the color pink, preferring green above all else, but I wanted my daughter to have the option to choose the things that she likes, regardless of color schemes or someone else’s definition of gender roles.
Orange and Lime Green stripes? You got it!
Black and white prints? All yours, kid!
Pink and ruffles? Voila!
And she loves it all. Feather boas and tea to aviator sunglasses and an astronaut costume- she is equally at home.
The “it was never a dress” campaign stirred those memories and handed me a new perspective on an icon that I myself have seen since I could see. “A cape! I love it!”
But then a friend of mine, who is as close to being a superhero as I know, posed the question, “What’s wrong with a dress?” (Make sure to read her post.) Looking back at the tagline of the campaign, I saw her point. They did say that it was “NEVER” a dress, even capitalizing the never for emphasis.
So, what’s wrong with a dress? Nothing. Absolutely nothing.
Instead of downplaying the femininity that a dress and the color pink have become a representations of, maybe we should ditch the “NEVER?” Because really, the empowerment lies in the message that you can be anything you darn well want to be.
Maybe it was NEVER a dress… but maybe it WAS a dress. Did anyone ever bother to ask her?
We as human beings, and not just women, are capable of possessing all of these characteristics simultaneously.
Caring and Kind
Strong and Protective
Smart and Innovative
Observant and Thoughtful
Courageous and Persistent
Resourceful and Creative
Those have nothing to do with one’s gender.
The empowerment is in the freedom to choose whether you want to wear a dress, a cape or any other article of clothing that makes you feel more like you. I like dressing up- sometimes. I like wearing makeup- always. And I am most comfortable in jeans and flats. That’s who I am, and I don’t mind any of it one bit. I know that I am so extremely fortunate to live in a time and place where I have the freedom to live comfortably as me without persecution. I also know that I don’t want my daughter, myself, or anyone else for that matter, to be judged based on taste in clothing. Pink dresses or not. That’s just silly.
I’m more than just a dress OR a cape. I believe at the root of both my friend’s question and her numerous valid points, and at the core of the “never a dress campaign,” the idea is the same: we should be comfortable and free to be ourselves.
That message is one that everyone needs to hear, regardless of gender. And do you know what? I think it is one that is being received by younger generations. I say this because recently someone gave my daughter a t-shirt that reads “Girls can change the world.” Although she was very appreciative of the gift, she told me afterwards that she won’t wear it out of the house because, as she said, “Boys can change the world too. I don’t want to make them feel bad.”
So… Dress or Cape? (Black and blue or white and gold?)
As long as the we’re getting behind the overall message that we have the freedom to choose for ourselves- I’m okay with either one.
[…] I just saw this beautiful response to the “Dress or Cape” question from my friend Kelly – if you ever wanted to know how to empower your children as a […]
The more I read this, the more I realize that 1) you are an awesome parent and 2) you are raising one heck of an awesome kid. That, and I think we could all take a lesson from your daughter in being comfortable in orange and lime green stripes, black and white prints, aviator sunglasses and a NASA flight suit, or boas and big hats. Maybe the world needs a little more dress-up!
You are beyond kind, Kristin. And honestly, you are one of the people that I am most inspired by on a daily basis! (New York misses you!)